When a child is being defiant, it does not indicate that they are bad nor is it a sign of poor parenting. It is a completely normal and natural urge for a child to want to assert their autonomy. Doing the opposite of what they have been asked to do is the perfect way for them to take control of their independence. Resisting our requests is a part of a child’s development, the same way that learning to walk and talk is. Punishing them for wanting to do this, therefore, is like punishing them for existing. Instead, it is important for us to show acceptance; not of the behaviour, but of the child.
Holding tightly to my mother’s hands, I walked nervously into the school yard. I heard my name being introduced to my teacher and an explanation that I was a shy child. I clutched at my mother’s legs as she tried to leave. I begged her to stay with me. I couldn’t be left there on my own. I was scared. I was going to be sick. She prised herself away from me, told me I would be okay and left.
Are your children risk takers? It can be hair raising can’t it?
It is completely natural for children to want to test their limits and seek out the thrill that taking risks can bring them. As parents, however, it can be extremely difficult to bite our tongues and have faith in our children to act with due care and diligence.
Do you find your child clings to you all day? Does whining and testing behaviour seem to be the norm at the moment? It could be because your child’s attention bucket needs filling.
Toilet training regression is extremely common in toddlers and young children. It can happen at varying times upon them first learning to use the toilet and can be stressful and frustrating for both the child and their parents.
In RIE parenting, toilet training is referred to as toilet learning. RIE teaches us that a child will learn to use the toilet when they are ready and do not need to be trained to do so. We have been on both sides of the coin with our children and are now happily watching our youngest child lead her toilet learning journey as we speak. There have been bumps along the way but this is our story so far.
Before I begin this post I want to say that we are by no means poverty stricken. We work hard to provide for the children and give them everything they need. We live in a comfortable, modest house with ample mod cons that I realise many do without. The issue for us though is that most of our income is tied up in debt repayments, bills, insurances and basic necessities leaving us with little to no discretionary income to spare. This post is my take on the impact this lack of income has had on our family.
Do you ever feel like your children are growing up WAY too quickly? Each day we get physical reminders that they are. We watch them take their first steps, say their first words, sing their first songs, climb their first tree or convey their first incredible memory by rehashing something we had long forgotten.
But is that it? Are they just growing up?
Needles are feared by many people in society, including up to 10% of the adult population. Children, in particular, share a common dislike of needles, often responding to them with significant objection along with screaming and in some cases, utter despair. So, it isn’t any wonder that taking children for their 4 year old needles is not high up there on a parent’s making-memorable-moments lists.